Be Here Now
A mantra for when my mind gets ahead of me
My work closes every year between Christmas and New Year—Which is great when I plan ways to use my time beforehand, but can be really difficult when I don’t have plans.
Two years ago was rough. We had just moved to a new town in late summer, I wasn’t prepared for how dark the winters would be (the fog tends to settle in the valley), and I had made zero plans. I was restless, severely depressed, and eager to get back to work.
The last two years, I’ve made plans and had things I needed to accomplish during that week off. Especially this year—I’ve had multiple projects to catch up on, and I still feel like I’m not where I want to be with them. I was supposed to return back to work on Friday (today, as I am writing this) but ended up taking the day off to try to get a bit more done.
On top of trying to catch up, I also let my mind wander into future hopes and dreams and plans, as one often does around the new year.
I found myself diving into those hopes for the future, and wondering how quickly I can make them happen—suddenly dissatisfied with a life I am generally quite satisfied and grateful for. I spent days researching and planning (and Pinning) these future plans, all the while counting down the days until Monday with dread.
Knowing that this is not the way to spend the last couple days of my holiday break, I realized I needed to set these dreams aside.
Not in a sad way. Not in a forever way. But simply recognizing that I have time. There is no rush. And these plans, like many plans, are better when they are planned for over time.
I realized that I need to be here now.
And so, if you also have the Sunday Scaries (on a Friday, Saturday, Sunday or whenever), this is a reminder to be here now. Right in the moment.
Today—Saturday—I’m back at my usual writing spot. During the break, I found myself toting my laptop and a huge study guide here to study for an upcoming professional certification. Today, I left that study guide at home. I have time to study in the coming weeks, but today, I want to get back to my regular routine.
This afternoon, I’ll go home and get a couple things done: I’ll tidy my office and get it ready for Monday morning; I’ll plant the half-dead lavender plants they were giving away at our local hardware store a few days ago in a last ditch effort to revive them; I’ll clean up my bedside table, which always seems to get littered with books and random remnants of my days.
I’ll be here now—while doing what I can to ensure a soft landing on Monday, when life gets back to normal.
Someday, those dreams and plans will fall into place. But life is pretty good as it is.
Keep Reading:
Winter Solstice
“Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world's grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.” - Attributed to the Talmud
Staying Grounded Amidst Political Stress
I’m slowly getting the hang of Substack: I had a logo made for my page! I finished my About Me page! And I quickly realized that, just like any other form of social media, I can get hooked scrolling on the main feed. Substack is learning my preferred algorithm: